Assalamalaykom warahmatullaah

Uh…this is just a random post..

I was just thinking that, we read books…we read stories on how some of the greatest people on earth lived their lives…how they dealt with calamities etc and we think that prepares us to face tough situations to an extent. But from my experience, all that you read and all that people say to you does not matter, does not effect you even a little when you truly are being tested. I mean, yes they are an example to us…but when people tell you “others have gone through it, you will too” that only aggravates the situation. Because unless you are the one in the situation, you will never have an idea how excruciating it is, thus you will not know how to handle it. How to react.

My point is, nothing and no one can prepare you for tough times, except Life. When life puts you in a situation, let it teach you how to deal with it. The first step though, is to accept it. Accept Qadr. You cannot change the past. All those who have reached the point where, you look at their faces and you see a comforting smile, you see them live their lives as if they have everything in the world yet these are the same people who have lost the most precious of things in their lives – forever. You will see tears in their eyes but you will not hear them complain. These same people – if you hear their stories, you will not find that they had that same strength, the same level of patience, tawakkul in Allaah that they have now. Rather, they have gone through a lot, they have had their highs and lows, they have had their times when they wanted to give up, they have had times of anger, of denial. It is a long and intense process that requires a tremendous amount of effort. Like they say No one is born a saint, they are self made (with the help of Allaah).

Believe in yourself. Have faith in yourself that, you can achieve what others thought possible. You can live through anything, because first and foremost, we are Muslims and we are believers and so we already have one guarantee that as long as we believe, we have Allaah. Your existence in itself is proof enough that you are able to take it; otherwise you would not have come so far.

For me, it certainly was a long process – it’s been six months now - and it still is but atleast I think I have come to terms with the situation I am in. I felt guilty; that I did not live up to the standards I had set for myself. To be patient, to…handle the situation with… grace so to speak. But like I mentioned above, you have to reach that point – all the way up there – but you gotta take it one step at a time and it does not get any easier.

I would not even be standing here if it weren’t for the few people that have stuck around (Alhamdulillaah). I…uh…well I was thinking what I did, but the question is…what did I not do to them? I yelled…I complained, I blamed, I was really – excuse me – bitchy. But they let me. And they always told me I can do it. And they did not turn their back on me. They are very few…but they are very dear to me.

Don’t ever regret the past, learn from it cuz you’ll drive yourself crazy with all the “what if’s”. Have faith in yourself, in Allaah and He will make a way out for you from sources unimaginable. [ Quran : And He will provide him from (sources) he never could imagine. And whosoever puts his trust in Allah, then He will suffice him. Verily, Allah will accomplish his purpose. Indeed Allah has set a measure for all things ]

Forget what people think of you ( although always consider the feelings of people close to you, people that matter) Just remember, Your Honor and true value lies with Allaah.